04 October 2010

Menagerie


me·nag·er·ie:

2. A diverse or miscellaneous group.

As in 'This is a menagerie of Lori crap .... a diverse group of items she wanted to write about.'


*****STUPIDITY*****

Yesterday, right before Gary's car came to take him to the airport ... I made the monumentally stupid mistake of opening my mouth.

Paraphrasing, and probably making me look better than I deserve:

Lori: "You know, a part of me is kinda sad this is all ending."

Gary: "The travelling?"

Lori: "No."

Gary: "The adventures?"

Lori: "Yes, but that's not what I was thinking of."

Gary: "What were you thinking of?"

Lori: "The you being home all the time ..."

Gary: "Oh, so, like you feel you can't run naked through the house and stuff, is that it?"

Lori: "Nah, I'd still do that ... I don't know. It's just weird. I am sort of used to living alone."
.
.
.
.

Lori: "I really didn't mean that ... really."

Gary: "I heard you CLEARLY state you weren't sure you wanted me living here."

Lori: "I DIDN'T say that. That is not what I meant, forget what I said."

Gary: "I heard you ..."

Lori: *sigh*

And thus - with this warm fuzzy good-bye, Gary got in a car and was driven to the airport.
.
.

Odd - he didn't call me - just a couple of texts!

Actually, he was not mad (I don't think).

I sort of expected him to say that he wasn't so sure he wanted to live with me either. Let's face it - I am not a person who is easy to live with ... the exact opposite. But he is too nice to say that.

It's not that we don't get along ... we get along FABULOUSLY! I can't put it in words - I guess it is the part that there was NO ONE to worry about ...

... if I didn't go shopping and we were out of milk - I didn't need to apologise to anybody.

... if I didn't want to shower that day ... who's was to know? OK, now all you guys ... but OTHER THAN THAT?

... if I didn't get to the laundry, or the baskets sat in the great room waiting to be folded, I didn't feel guilty or apologise about it.

... if I wanted to stay up all night and roam the house, surf the net, play with my photography, read a book ... I didn't have to explain myself.

But I realised last night that NOTHING, none of the above or anything else my demented mind can think up can make up for rolling over in the morning and instead of being face to face with a black furry creature ... looking into those wonderful, clear, sky blue eyes with the laugh crinkles at the corners...

NOTHING makes up for the way he makes me laugh. Nothing makes up for the things he does for me ... even standing on the counters in the kitchen ... I can't reach our light bulbs to change them ... I am HELPLESS without him! Lame, but true - I can't even change a light bulb without him ...

He does the shopping when I am too depressed to navigate the aisles (and if he wants to eat). He does the cleaning up when I am sick in bed. He makes me smile, he makes me laugh, he makes me feel good about myself, he makes me want to get out of bed in the morning. He is the most wonderful person I know ... truthfully ... and I really am excited that he is coming home for good!

Why do I say the things I do?

Simple:


... I am an idiot ...

*****SEASONAL CHANGES*****

Got up at 3:30am having slept a WHOLE two hours before Charlie demanded to be let out. It felt so great! It was fifty seven degrees outside and seventy seven inside with the air conditioner running. So I ran about the house and threw open the windows. I love the smell of my house when I have the windows open!

Charlie's no dummy ... I wondered where she was for the longest time:

I even CLIMBED ON TO MY SIDE TABLE reached down over all the crud I have stored there and opened the window in the office:


Thing is ... see that alarm system down there? Yeah - the windows were open downstairs and it was warning me that zones two through five were 'breached' or whatever - it was freaked. Which in reality means nothing. If someone wanted to break into our house, all they need to do is break the front door glass and walk right in ... but still ... those red zones told something in my brain that I needed to be vigilant, thus I didn't go back to sleep. I was up for the day - working on the computer, reading up on some cool techniques and trying them out in Photoshop.


*****SUNRISE******

At some point in the middle of the night, I realised that I was in the mood to take sunrise photos. Loaded Charlie in the car and when we passed the turn off for Sonic and didn't take it, she looked at me curiously ... serious ... she did (she didn't ask me 'What's up?' so calm down). I told her we would be back. She was stuck in the car as I got my photos though. Not a good combination: me, a camera and Charlie on a leash while a bazillion walkers with dogs zipped by - they were out in DROVES ... She was not happy about it.

I was not disappointed, I couldn't have predicted the colors, timed it better or imagined I would see a sky like this ... and no, these are NOT Photoshopped. The color is what my camera captured. Alright, alright, my camera was on the 'sunset' setting ... which makes sunrises and sunsets more vivid ... now you know my secret:


Went to Sonic ... got more coupons ... was told I had an adorable dog ... drove home ... and took a nap. Now the temperature in the house is sixty nine and the temperature outside is eighty ... but I am too lazy to close all the windows - we will see how I do when it gets dark. I will probably be shutting the downstairs windows ... so sad, but I'm thinking I will eventually need more sleep than an hour here and an hour there...


*****SUSPENSE******


So ... Gary's plane lands in about two hours - I would feel sorry for him, but he is in business class and has always been able to sleep at least eight of that thirteen / fourteen hour flight. OK, I still feel sorry for him ...




Here's the question: Do you think he will call me?







I'm not sure ....


*****SIGN OFF******

3 comments:

Jennifer said...

I love this post! It is funny and happy and just, I don't, very Lori. I totally get the loss-of-no-accountability feeling. Even if he doesn't care when you do (or don't do) all those things, it is different when nobody knows at all. But I'm so happy for his return.

Kristie said...

That post totally made me laugh! I have been in that exact same place a couple of times, so even if Gary doesn't understand, I totally do!!

Vicki said...

So funny. I think you make a good point, though. Any relationship (even perfect ones) take time.