Does Not Bode Well ...

It is 11:30. One half hour into church and what am I doing? I just rolled out of bed to see how my stomach would take it ... this time. OK, so far.

So - the problem is I have been trying to get feeling better for DAYS and DAYS. I have laid in bed til boredom brought tears to my eyes, but I WAS GOING TO BE WELL ON SUNDAY - DANG IT. I had a plane (well two, really) to catch. And nothing was going to stop me from getting on it.

Gary has gently suggested that I postpone my trip until the middle of January - but there is one little wrinkle to this perfectly sane suggestion: RYAN IS COMING ... NOW. I won't miss out on vacation time with Gary and Ryan in Australia. This will be the only time Gary actually takes days off work to play. And they plan on doing some things I don't want to do: a water park - the beach is sort of scaring me after my (perceived) near drowning experience in Maui last year - so there are days I can just lounge around and surf (on the web) while they go play.

Ryan is off at church with Gary - which is a good thing, since he is walking around all worried about me. I told him I have a plan - it is extensive and well thought out - took me all night to figure it out:

1) I have checked Ryan and I in to our Continental flight from Houston to LAX and we are sort of sitting together, but not really. Gary has been upgraded to First Class - so while we lounge around with the goats and chickens, he will be eating dinner on fine china ... Not a biggie - I am over it. So I can basically ignore them up to this point ... I am pretty sure.

We are no where near each other on our flight from LAX to Brisbane - Ryan and I are checked in there also - I have no idea what Gary does to get on the plane - he has a gold card - so maybe a limo will pick him up and shuttle him to the next flight for all I know - never traveled with him to Australia. I am 3 sections of the plane in front of them (right across from the bathrooms - yeah!) and they are across the aisle from each other on row 70 - Gary in his favorite (economy) seat that affords just a titch more leg room for those 3 foot long thigh bones...

So - my plan basically entails ignoring them and pretending that we are not together. That way when someone sees me barf in a garbage can, or lie down in the middle of the floor in LAX - they won't have to shudder and mention sheepishly that they are with the sick, crazy lady.

It's a good start, yes?

and

2):

I found an old drug that I had to take for some time. For crazy people? No, but it should stop me from barfing in various garbage cans, which should help big time with the 'crazy' perception. It is a medication given to chemo patients for nausea and it stops EVERYTHING. You might still feel like you are going to barf, but the vagus nerve is deadened and so are the stomach muscles necessary to upchuck - thus keeping necessary nutrients in when you are going through chemo. Me? It won't be great - but I won't be kindly escorted out of the airport for barfing in a garbage can. Clever aren't I? I have six - enough to get me there and then some. Way cool.

So - in approximately five hours - I have to have my act together enough to sneak by Gary and Ryan the fact that I really would rather die than take a 4 hour flight to LA, schlep my bags a mile down two terminals, then take that wonderful 14 hour flight to Brisbane. But I would feel left out - so - I will go ... AND I WILL ENJOY IT!

Let you know how it turns out - on my Down Under Tuesday (your Monday) when I get there! (I know you are all breathlessly awaiting the news ...)