Hours 0 – 6: Asleep
Hour 7 : lazing about in bed
7.5 – Kiss Gary goodbye, he tells me he will see me in 5 weeks.
7.5 – 9.5 – Wash bedding, vacuum, clean kitchen, clean apartment
9.5 – Taxi arrives
10 : Arrive at Brisbane International Airport
10 – 10:30 : Shopping, Security: First Wave
10:30 : Security: Second Wave. Since the incident of the flight from The Netherlands, security has been beefed up for flights departing to the US. Full baggage search and a full body pat down (how exciting!).
“Hmm … is she going to go through EVERYTHING?" My two computers, my three cameras, my kindle, my Palm, my Palm cell phone, my Blackberry, my Australian cell phone, my iPod, my 3 pairs of headphones, the 3 external hard drives, my external DVD player, all their power cords and accessories, my medicine bag, my wooden box I bought with the jewelry I bought inside it, my shopping bag with the stuff I bought at the airport, my wallet, my leather ‘hold all stuff that does not fit in my wallet’ … and the rest?
Yep. Man – she opens every zipper, goes through every piece of paper, ISN’T PUTTING STUFF BACK LIKE IT BELONGS. "You are messing everything up, STOP IT, STOP IT!" I’m breaking out in HIVES …
"Maybe my OCD is worse than I thought."
"STOP TOUCHING MY STUFF, STOP TOUCHING MY STUFF, STOP TOUCHING MY STUFF!!! AHHHHGGGGGGG!!!”
11:00 – “Ooooh, almost done. DON’T JUST SHOVE EVERYTHING IN THE BACKPACK – GEEZE!! Aw, man – now I am going to have to repack EVERYTHING or I will develop a tic and a rash. Yeah, my OCD is worse." I believe this does not bode well for my future. I see medication, a hovel (albeit a neat hovel) full of cats and me scaring off all the children in the neighborhood.
“Mmmm, NEVER had a female get THIS FRIENDLY WITH MY BODY BEFORE. This is the creepiest thing ever. Ewww, Stop it, you've made it to 2nd base - that is FAR ENOUGH" ... and in front of everyone – oh, well – they get to do it too.
11:05 : Done with second security screening - “Well THAT was fun … I just feel discombobulated and slimy? Sleezy? Icky?”
Sit down, pull everything out of my bags and re-pack. HUGE sigh of relief – all is right with the world again … "Girl, you've got problems. Tell me about it - I am talking to myself ..."
11:20 : Loudspeaker: “Paging Lori Hurst – please report to gate 80”
“Whaaaaa? I JUST GOT THROUGH WITH SUPER FRIENDLY GESTAPO LADY – I AM SO NOT LEAVING THE AREA TO GO TO GATE 80” I would have to go through the security screening all over again, and as much as I loved Gestapo Lady touching my privates, it ain’t happening again ….
Out loud: “Sir (at Gate 86) I was just paged and don’t want to leave the secure area – my name is Lori Hurst.”
“Please upgrade me … please upgrade me … please upgrade me”. It could happen ...
Unfortunately they just wanted to see my passport since I checked in online. "Damn"
11:30 – Boarding
12:00 – Shut the doors to the aircraft
“YES!!!! Four seats ALL TO MYSELF!!!” No one was sitting in the row next to me (I picked the row for that very reason when I checked in online. “Sleep – HERE I COME!!”
Loudspeaker: “Folks, please stay in your assigned seats until after we take off”
“Drats!! I don’t want to get shafted like last time I had 4 seats to myself by someone sneaking over and sitting in the other aisle seat. I need a plan ….”
12:20 – Liftoff
10 seconds into lift off I duck down, unbuckle my seat belt (... what? If we were going to crash I don’t think the seat belt was going to help much …) pick up my backpack and plunk it down on the 3th seat over from mine – the other aisle seat. NOW no one will sit there and I can lay about in luxury!!! Slithered back over and re-buckled my seat belt.
12:30 – Loudspeaker – “This is your captain speaking. Our flight time will be just 12 hours today”
“YES! I will probably make my connecting flight and everything! Aside from the mild petting session - this day is going GREAT!”
12:30 – 13:30 – Lovely dinner with a movie – Michael Jacksons “This is It” since I was not going to be paying attention to it anyway.
13:30 – Started “All about Steve”, but so weird and boring I turned it off and lay down.
“THIS IS SO COOL!!!”
14:00 : Sit up, hip hurting (as usual – this ain’t my bed at home – but I am not complaining)
14:15 – 16:30 : Start a movie with Jennifer Aniston – was OK, watched it.
Loop the plane for a little walk. Notice the uber friendly couple making out kitty corner from me.
“Ugh, get a room”
17:00: “Um, KIDDING about the room!!!”
Friendly couple sneak, one at a time, into one of the larger bathrooms. Assuming they are joining the ‘Mile High Club’
“Ewwww – OK, there are seven other bathrooms I can use …”
17:30 – Start a stupid movie called ‘The Informant!’ with Matt Damon. Kept my interest … sort of – so watched it. Was hoping for the end to come about ¾ the way through.
17:30 – 18:00 – Lay down. “Still – VERY COOL!!”
18:00 – Walk the plane.
18:30 – 20:00 : Read my Baldacci book on my Kindle.
20:00 : Walk the plane. Decide to sneak into First Class to steal a wash cloth from their restroom. Trick is … just act like you belong there and no one stops you. (This works equally well in hospitals I have discovered).
20:15 – Back to my seat. Store my washcloth with the complimentary toothbrush and toothpaste they supply. I wouldn’t have to resort to stealing from First Class if they would have continued their practice of bringing all the ‘unwashed’ back in economy a hot, moist washcloth right before breakfast. What moron decided to stop that to save a few pennies? It felt so good! So now I am left to my own devices to feel refreshed.
20:20 – lie down; review my time since I left the apartment. Decide to write it all down – get out my computer and, well here I am. But now I am caught up … later,
20:30 – 21:00 : Type this. Look at my information screen – Time to Destination: 3:02. WoooHooo! I am ¾ the way through my flight. Very cool.
Over and out – for now.
21:30 : “I must have ADD, can’t stick with a documentary, a movie or my book. Let’s try the CD library”
21:30 – 22:15 - Listen to Maroon 5 lying on my back, stretched out and purring like a kitty.
22:15 : Walk the plane
22:30 : Lay down with my trusty Kindle and start reading.
22:40 : The MOTHER of all turbulence hits! And me without my seat belt. Sit up hurriedly and snap in the buckle. Seat belt sign goes on. This isn’t the ordinary jostling turbulence or the ever fun roller coaster turbulence that makes you want to hurl. This is slamming side to side, up and down “Break a Wing Off” turbulence.
“Shit – there is less than two hours to go – it would be such a waste to die now …”
22:50 : Turbulence stops – sign goes off. “Sigh …”
22:50 – 23:30 – Read
23:30 – 24:00 - Breakfast
24:20 : Touchdown! And now it is officially 6:20am on Friday in Los Angeles, 5 1/2 hours earlier than when I left Brisbane.
24:25 : Immigration – Oh. My. Gosh! No lines!
24:35 : Customs – Oh. My. Gosh! No lines!
Schlep on over to Terminal 6 – a lovely invigorating walk – with a beautiful sunrise.
24:50 : Security Screening – Oh. My. Gosh! No lines!
25:00 (7:00am) Through all the lines and my flight does not leave until 9:00am – I am dumbfounded – I have NEVER done anything but rush to the gate as they were already boarding.
25:00 – 26:30 – Relax, buy some water, read my Kindle, marvel at how well the day has gone.
26:30 : Board the plane.
“Cool, one of Continental new planes – with a touch screen entertainment system”
27:00 – Take off
27:00 – 30:10 – Entertained, jostled, and counting down the hours until I touch down in Houston.
30:10 – Now officially 2:10 in Houston time
30:45 – Catch a ride with my wonderful friend and her husband.
31:30 - HOME!!!! AND CHARLIE!!!
“Ooops – should have watered the plants, hmmm”
“This place is a disaster – I need to pick up … tomorrow. COMPUTER!!! *hugs* I have missed you”
31:30 – 36:30 – On the computer – doing … stuff, playing with the dog, ignoring the disaster area around me.
36:30 (8:30) “Odd, I am not tired at all? I must have hit ‘the wall’ – oh, well – lets keep playing …”
36:30 – 38:30 – Playing with new electronic gadget I purchased and had delivered today … Way more important than sleep, right?
"Why am I not in bed? Why am I buzzed? Why am I nuts?"
38:30 - 40:00 (midnight) - It's anybodies guess what I am going to do for the next hour and a half. Sleep would be good, "Go to bed! Go to bed!" but I am buzzed.
Maybe I will start cleaning ... (actually I spend my time generating the rest of this post that I didn't type on the airplanes)
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG DAY. But a good one. A very good one - except for the leaving Gary part (ok and the 'almost' strip search).
4 comments:
Welcome Back. Glad to see, read; that the flight home went pretty good. Save for the intimate grope of Helga at security! Funny, well funny to read anyway. Get some sleep. Good to have you back.
I'm guessing your reaction to the "strip search" and security screening is pretty typical. When I just go through security in the states, it is very disconcerting as you have all your stuff everywhere, it is moving it front of you, you are trying to work fast so you don't hold up anything, putting everything back is tough (especially with it moving), you are afraid you'll forget something.
Your security search was multiple times worse. I can imagine you felt like you had been rung through the ringer.
Glad to know you made it!
I am in your shadow. I cannot believe you do this over and over again. I would have started crying at 11:20. I love your writing about it. I can picture it. And vow that Australia will never be worth it for me.
Jennifer - Australia is not worth it ... by my husband is.
Post a Comment